“I heard that if enough Christians get together, they’ll become hypocrites. Yeah it’s crazy, they start to turn on each other. It’s completely against everything they stand for. And they claim to be a community of righteous God-fearers.”
It would not come as a surprise to overhear that from an agnostic who toured Grove City College – or most churches, for that matter. Despite the fact that we know our words should be edifying, filled with grace, and pointing each other toward the truth, our conversations are constantly filled with poisonous darts of salacious gossip – poisonous darts of half-truths.
Gossip includes starting rumors, passing on rumors, soliciting information not yours to know, passing along information that was not yours, and discussing privileged information in public settings while withholding consideration for who could hear. We do it all the time.
Why?
Discussing the indecent matters of other people’s lives brings us a twisted sense of power. We all want to be in the know. Gossiping gives us some ethereal sense that we have control in our personal and social lives because we can imagine all the ways we would manage other people’s problems better if we were in their shoes.
We talk about others because it’s easier than doing the work we’re supposed to do. Instead of starting a research paper, we talk about who is rushing what Greek group. Instead of finishing our math homework, we pass along who’s sleeping together. We relay the shocking, the savage, the profane, to our own glory.
And what kind of glory is that? It is the glory that comes with having two eyeballs and bad timing because you saw something you weren’t supposed to see. It is a glory that comes with false confidence and bravado that overshadows any genuine desire to inform people of arising issues.
In a boring world, the bearer of drama is more popular than those who start said drama. They appear above the fray – an unscathed, simple bystander, innocent of any real fault in comparison to the clear horrors that others do.
The issue, therefore, is twofold: we’re bored, and we’re gossiping. We’re bored because our mindset collectively shifted toward perpetual entertainment. Gossip is like fun-sized Snickers that go down easily and come to us in pretty packaging. We decided that processed thoughts should make up the majority of the diets of our thoughts, that entertaining tidbits of distant others’ lives were sufficient spiritual nutrition.
In Philippians 4:8, Paul commands us as follows: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” Gossip is not true or honorable or pure or lovely – least of all is it commendable. We intentionally fill our minds with worthlessness when we gossip.
Paul also commands in Ephesians 4:29 to “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” Gossip does not build up, and it never fits the occasion. Gossiping attacks the dignity of other human beings, made in the image of God. Paul’s instruction in Ephesians falls under the command to one’s neighbor as themselves.
Most damningly, James 1:26 says, “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.” If we claim to be a Christian school – or if people at Grove City claim to be Christians – we make ourselves liars with each intentional gossip session. Not only do we defame our neighbors but we defame the name of truth and the Author of truth by “deceiving” our hearts. We should know better.
We gossip often because we think it’s harmless. No one else is supposed to know about our chatter, right? People know. They can see it in the way you look at them, the fake smiles, the distance. The person you’re talking about could overhear what you’re saying, or perhaps a dutiful friend might inform the person of the slander of their name. No matter how hard we try to cover up our sin, or how righteous we think we are by airing other people’s dirty laundry, gossip is an avoidable sin that reflects how bored and stupid we’ve become.
Proverbs 10:18 leaves us with this: “The one who conceals hatred has lying lips, and whoever utters slander is a fool.” Gossip involves more than just speaking poorly about someone, for gossip requires that the gossiper treat others like friends when hating them in the heart. We have to bump shoulders with people of all sorts, even some we may not like, even some who may have drama attached to them. We cannot fool ourselves into believing that being kind means two-faced saccharine behavior towards people we would rather talk about than see and talk to.
The Lord is not pleased to see us tear each other down, and the Devil is delighted to see Christians actively despise each other through gossip and slander.
What is to be done, amid these rushes of gossip?
